The mysterious Origins of Bonnie Prince Billy

Will Oldhams selbstgeschriebene Kurzbiographie auf Gyroskope. Pure Poesie in einem peripheren Medium, das ansonsten von PR-Futzis und Leuten frequentiert wird, die ernsthaft “And like me on Facebook” irgendwohin schreiben. Der große bärtige Mann des Neo Folk hat übrigens zusammen mit David Byrne fünf Songs für den kommenden Sean Penn-Film This must be the Place geschrieben, in dem Penn einen alternden Goth auf Nazijagd spielt.

Bonny’s parents performed intercourse merely once, but it was deeply tantric, lasting so long they conceived and birthed 3 children during the single act. Bonny was born Siamese twins, conjoined at every part of the body—overlapped perfectly on top of one another so he looked like just one guy. During puberty, Bonny’s Other began to itch, so he underwent a procedure to be surgically separated from himself, cell by cell. When doctors attempted to reassemble the extracted Boniface, they wound up with just two frogs, a jaybird, and a monkey holding a banjo. It was at this point he began to noodle around with music.

The Bonny ‘Prince’ quickly showed skill: he could reach into an oak tree with his bare hands, pull out its still beating heart and show it to the tree before it dropped dead. Afterwards he reached into its corpse and pulled out a handful of chili. It was upon this chili that Le Bonnes supped during his lean years of artistic struggle.

Determined to forge his own scrappy sonic path, Billy invented a brand new musical note out of just a bottle cap, a sack of raisins and a lawnmower engine, all held together with dried duck sauce and twine.

Every night he fell asleep with cookies in his mouth, wet the bed in the shape of Abraham Lincoln, and awoke covered with bruises in the shape of lyrics. The first time Bonnie tried to sing, nothing came out except thousands of flies. He nursed these creatures on the milky diligence of his meaty teat and soon their bellies were so round they sang like angels.