The A–Z of Music Journalism Bullshit
The Stool Pigeon hat ‘ne tolle Liste der schlimmsten Formulierungen des Musikjournalismus. Mein persönlicher Musikjournalism-Bullshit seit ein paar Jahren ist ja nach wie vor EDM. 1.) Gab es bereits in den 80ern Electronic Body Music, 2.) Ist zumindest heutzutage ohnehin nahezu jegliche Dance-Music elektronisch (wobei man natürlich streiten kann, ob Rock oder Punk nicht auch strenggenommen Tanzmusik sind)… jedenfalls: EDM, pfff, Bullshit. Hier meine Favorites:
Deconstructionist pop — sounds like Animal Collective
Elegantly wasted — Let’s be real: if you saw the pallid human blancmange that is Pete Doherty slinking down the street towards you in jeans and T-shirt, you’d give him the widest of possible berths. But give the man a trilby hat and a blood-spattered volume of symbolist poetry, and lo, he becomes “elegantly wasted”. It’s OK, we don’t get it either.
Pop for a perfect world — Trust us, you don’t want to know what a music critic’s perfect world looks like. But you can bet your ass it features Shins B-sides at numbers one to forty in the charts. And still they’d have the temerity to try and make a living from their self-important whingeing.
“Set the blogosphere alight” — Well done! Your innovative blend of Fleetwood Mac, nineties R&B and Sade — a singer you’d never even heard of before The xx started banging on about her — has “set the blogosphere alight” with your brand new track, featuring artfully NSFW video. That Pitchfork BNM’d is surely in the post.
Whiskey-soaked vocals — English lit polytechnic graduate, now based in Warrington, seriously wishes he was Tom Waits
An A-Z Guide to Music Journalist Bullshit (via Dangerous Minds)
Artyfarty Bullshit Generator
Es gibt nichts schlimmeres, als die künstlich aufgeblähten, semi-intellektuellen Infotexte zu Projekten in Kunst und Design (also… es gibt schon ein paar schlimmere Dinge… aber nicht viele!) Damit man sich für seinen Kunstbullshit nicht mehr den Kopf zerbrechen muss, um ein paar Zeilen mit inhaltsleeren Worthülsen zu füllen, hier: der Arty Bollocks Generator (via Diskursdisko)
My work explores the relationship between the tyranny of ageing and skateboard ethics. With influences as diverse as Kierkegaard and John Lennon, new combinations are generated from both simple and complex meanings. Ever since I was a student I have been fascinated by the traditional understanding of the human condition. What starts out as triumph soon becomes debased into a tragedy of temptation, leaving only a sense of decadence and the chance of a new synthesis.
As spatial forms become frozen through emergent and diverse practice, the viewer is left with an insight into the inaccuracies of our condition.
